**There are many references to assault in this essay**
I want to begin with this.
I realize that personifying earth and its features as womanly, nurturing, motherly, and as a symbol of feminine power is something we do often. I can understand this. I personify nature as a woman in my creative writing, too.
I take issue with something specific. I am frankly disturbed when people write about Mother Earth being raped. There are problems with this concept on many levels.
To begin with, sexual assault and rape are experienced by human beings. Often, these human beings are women. Women experience lifelong ramifications from these acts…
Do you know those questions that young, happening startups tend to ask? The “get to know you” ones?
Describe your hobbies.
Tell me a fun fact about yourself.
Questions like that immediately clear out the thoughts in my head. I mean, I could literally have been thinking about my hobby, but the fact that I am now expected to share it makes the thought scurry away into nothingness.
I don’t know what to say. I was sure I had a hobby just a moment ago, but as of this second, I have no answer for you. …
It’s no secret that societies around the world are obsessed with heroes. A hero isn’t even enough. We need superheroes.
Just look at the statistics on the highest-grossing films. In 2019, the Avengers: Endgame grossed close to 3 billion dollars worldwide. It was the highest-grossing film that year. Spider-Man and Captain Marvel also made the cut for top 5 highest grossing films, both generating over 1 billion each.
We are enamored by the idea of a larger than life character.
He can swoop into a situation and put right what’s wrong. And, if there’s a supervillain, that’s even better. …
There was once an intelligent woman with big dreams who fell for a guy who couldn’t even show her basic respect. She kept making things easier for him, and he continued to show her just how little he cared about meeting her ever-decreasing standards.
She was willing to put in most of the work. She was ready to take most of the steps in his direction. She just needed him to give her a little scrap of hope. On that small scrap, she would find a way to rest her entire future with him.
If he could show her that…
A Short Story
She was twenty six the first time her mother began asking her questions about sex. Of course she was surprised.
Sex was taboo. It was a topic shrouded in mystery. She had to learn everything about it for herself. Nobody would broach the subject, and if it popped up, they would shove it down, change the channel, turn the radio off, feign deafness and blindness. They would do whatever it took to pretend the unthinkable had not occurred.
But, ever since she had found herself a boyfriend, her mother had begun to question her about her relationship.
First she thought…
In my early twenties, I suffered from a severe bout of clinical depression. I didn’t want to be around people. My room became my sanctuary. I just wanted to watch movies, eat, and remain in the comfort of my bed.
The moment there was an expectation that I would interact with people or venture out into the world, my body would respond with irresistible drowsiness. A simple dinner out became hard work. Going to a movie was impossible.
In subsequent years, I learned coping mechanisms that helped me deal with my depression and anxiety.
I went to the other extreme.
Having a big and busy social…
“Sorry” is a textured word.
Just saying it isn’t enough to start the healing process. In fact, the words used in the apology, the tone, and the level of seriousness all play a role in its success.
What is a successful apology?
Well, it’s one that helps to restore at least a part of the lost trust.
Trust is exactly what you should keep at the center when you think about apologies. It’s how we contextualize the apology. A good apology shows an understanding of the transgression. It helps the injured party feel that they are being considered. …
The relationship was asymmetrical from the beginning.
The start of a relationship is a pretty solid predictor of how the rest of the relationship will go. A lot of behavior patterns tend to get cemented early on.
If you allow a person to get more out of you than you get out of them, this will likely continue happening. If you come into a relationship with weak boundaries, there’s a strong chance that you won’t be able to establish better boundaries later on without breaking the relationship.
You have unaddressed codependency issues.
One of the key signs of a codependent is that their behavior is largely organized around another person. A codependent…
Rebeca Ansar
rebecawrites.com | blog and articles in An Amygdala
